


Stupid

by DearLazerBunny



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-11 04:21:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16468622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DearLazerBunny/pseuds/DearLazerBunny
Summary: for @ninadewitt who requested a consoling Kylo after the reader does poorly on her exams. Let me know if you like it, Nina! :)





	Stupid

No. No, no, no, this cannot be happening. You feel numb as you stare at the big fat red 40 stamped on your most recent exam. God, you knew it was going to be a tough test, but… 40?! Your cheeks burn as though it’s been posted in front of the entire class for them to laugh at. Quickly shoving it into the deep dark depths of your backpack, not caring if it gets crumpled in the process, you swing your bag over your shoulder and hightail it out of the lecture hall.

Your professor is saying something as you leave, but you can barely make it out over the ringing in your ears- “Okay, class, if anyone has any questions, remember my office hours are posted, and our TA is always available…” yeah, right. Like you were going to let _anyone_ in on this catastrophe. Heading across the lawn, you can feel the tears welling up in your eyes as reality starts to sink in. If you could just make it back to your room, then you could let the tears fall, but for now you try to swallow the sinking feeling in your chest and blink away the waterworks.

“Hey, Y/N! Wait up!” You stop to let Rey jog up beside you. “Man, that test was a doozie. I only got like a 77. How’d you do on it?”

“Oh, just fine!” You plastered a fake grin onto your face, and even though the smile nowhere reached your eyes, it seemed to fool her well enough.

“Ugh, you’re so smart, I almost want to hate you for it.” She playfully joshes your shoulder and you give her a high pitched laugh. “Want to get some lunch? My treat for the big smarty over here.”

“Uh, no, that’s okay. I think I need to go… take a nap.” Not the best Excuse you could have come up with, and Rey can tell. She isn’t stupid.

“Y/N, is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, fine! Just tired is all.” The fake smile returns.

Rey shrugs her shoulders and heads off in the direction of the student center. “Suit yourself. See ya!”

“Bye.” You wave half heartedly as she goes, fighting back the tears even more. She couldn’t have known how much her comments hurt but… wow. Yeah, that stung.

You luckily made it back to your room without any more incidents and could let the sobs fly. You curled up on your bed and just cried. This was going to absolutely ruin your grade, and that was going to ruin your GPA- and then you might lose your scholarship altogether, which is the only thing even keeping you here at school. God, how were you going to tell your parents? Even worse, how were you going to tell-

There’s a knock on your door, interrupting your anxious train of thought. Looking through the peephole, you swear softly and dash back to your desk to hide any evidence of your cry fest- tissues are shoved deep into the wastebasket, your pillow is flipped over to hide the water stains, and you do a quick mirror check to wipe off the mascara cascading down your cheeks. He knocks again and you do a final finishing brush to your hair as you run to answer it. “Coming!”

You open the door to your boyfriend Kylo standing there, backpack slung across his shoulder and a smile on his face. “Hey, babe. Can I come in?”

“Yeah, of course!” You clear your scratchy throat and step back to let him into your room. He tosses his bag to the side and collapses onto your bed, hands over his face. “God, that was such a nightmare. Do you know how many people came up to me screaming about their grade? I’m like, if you wanted a better grade, you should have studied more!”

“Haha, yeah, I can imagine.” You lean your back against the door, trying to act casual. “Being the TA for that class must be a pain.”

“You have no idea. Well, I guess you do, considering you’re in it.” He winks at you, but his usual joking around isn’t having much affect on your or your mood, which he picks up on instantly. “Y/N? You okay?”

“Just peachy.” You try to pull off that fake smile again but it isn’t fooling him, especially when your voice wavers at the end.

“Hey, come here.” He holds out a hand and you reluctantly go to him, afraid that if he starts pressing you won’t be able to keep it together. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is-”

“No, nope, wrong. I can tell something’s up. Out with it.” He pulls you into his lap and nuzzles you, which does get a bit of a laugh from you.

“I swear, nothing is wrong. I’m just tired is all.”

“Hm.” He playfully scrutinizes every inch of your face, turning it side to side like he’s inspecting a piece of art. You make your eyes go wide and try to put some happiness back into them, hoping he won’t notice how upset you actually are. “Alright then. If you’re not going to tell me…” He changes the subject, much to your relief, and starts talking about other parts of his day. It’s nice to think about something else for a change, so you sit in his lap, letting his heartbeat calm you, and nod along at all the right spots. You almost think you’re in the clear, until- “oh, I didn’t even ask. How’d you do on the test?”

You freeze, heart beating out of your chest. “Um. Fine.”

“Okay, I just wanted to make sure, ‘cause like I said apparently a lot of people had problems with it-”

“I said I did fine, Kylo,” you snap, pulling away from him. “So just drop it.”

Immediately, his eyebrows furrow in concern. “Y/N… you sure you did okay?”

“Oh, no, I did brilliantly! Absolutely stunning, since apparently I’m such a genius who can do no wrong!” You fling yourself off the bed and stand on the other side of the room, arms crossed like you’re holding yourself together. “I did absolutely perfect, so _there_.”

“Whoa, okay, I didn’t mean to say anything wrong-”

“I KNOW!” You whirl on him, angry and disappointed and just upset with yourself, but you take it out on him instead. “So just shut up, okay?!” Before you can stop them, a few tears work their way down your cheek, and you violently wipe them away with the sleeve of your sweatshirt.

“Y/N-”

“STOP!” The crying is back in full force and you flop onto the bed, hands covering your face as the tears flow. “Just stop, just leave me alone.”

“I- okay. I’m going.” He stands to leave, but something red on your desk catches his eye. “Y/N- is this your test?”

Oh, shit. You’d forgotten to shove it into the garbage along with the rest of the tissues, so your big fat 40 is sitting there incriminating you right on your desk. “Maybe,” you groan miserably into your pillow.

The bed dips with Kylo’s weight as he sits down beside you, putting a tentative hand on the small of your back. “Babe… why didn’t you tell me? I’m the freaking TA for the class, you could have come to me-”

Your voice is still muffled with feathers when you reply, “I didn’t want you to think I was stupid.”

“Hey… come here…” he gently lifts you from where you’ve burrowed into your bed to reveal a tear-stained face and red eyes. “I would never, ever think that you’re stupid.”

“I knooooow,” you groan, burying your face into the crook of his neck. “I was just so embarrassed…”

He wraps his arms around you and pulls you close, not minding the fact that you’re probably getting mascara on his shirt and probably look a hot mess. “I understand. It’s a hard class, I don’t blame you.”

“Really?”

“Math isn’t exactly everyone’s forte.”

“But you’re so good at it…”

“That doesn’t mean you have to be. We’re not competing to see who can beat who, or trying to keep pace with one another. You have your own stuff that I wouldn’t be able to do in a thousand years.”

You sniff. “I guess.”

“I know.” He kisses your forehead softly, then reaches for your chin and raises it until you’re looking at him. “I’ll never fault you for failing, Y/N. You can come to me with anything. Even a 40. Or a 0. I’ll always be here for you.”

You sigh, pressing a kiss to his lips, which he gently returns. “I’m sorry for acting so stupid.”

“And about that. You’re not stupid. Not now, not ever. You are the kindest, smartest, most amazing person I know, and I refuse to let you put yourself down like that. Okay?”

That puts a little smile on your face, the corner of your mouth just barely curling upwards. “Okay.”

“Good.” He kisses you for real this time, and you happily kiss him back, your heart getting lighter with each and every moment you spend in his arms. 


End file.
